In a family, spouses have mutual rights and responsibilities. Often couples become cold over time and look for reasons to end their marriage. People break up without ever really getting to know the character of their loved one.
Russian legislation is based on the principles of preserving the family until there are compelling grounds for divorce. It is important for the state that couples be together, have children, and improve the overall demographic situation. Various social support measures and federal programs are being taken.
It is not always the case that a family union remains strong over the years. A divorce is brewing, accompanied by legal procedures, and division of property is not ruled out. This material will concern some of them. The specifics of preparing a statement of claim will be covered.
Life together did not work out - divorce from the legal perspective
In the Russian Federation, there is a Family Code (FC RF), which protects the family and lays the legal foundations for its normal functioning. Its provisions are used by citizens and courts when resolving conflict situations.
What are the reasons for divorce for which the state is ready to accommodate the spouses? After all, deciding to go through divorce proceedings is psychologically difficult. Everywhere they say that “this is bad, unacceptable.” But in reality, not everyone is able to successfully arrange their personal life right away.
The ideal option for those who want to quickly break off a relationship and start with a “clean slate” would be the mutual consent of the spouses to the divorce process. This is understandable; it is much more difficult to explain oneself before the law for the decision made. With a mutual agreement, they indicate that life together was not a success.
Note! The content of the claim helps the court understand how difficult things are in the family. Is it worth giving a chance for reconciliation or is there no point in this?
Psychological aspects of divorce
The cornerstone of all human problems, including those related to the inability to build family relationships, is the psychological immaturity of the individual. In other words – infantilism. The phenomenon is widespread and very difficult to eradicate in our time due to blurred values and lack of moral guidelines.
It manifests itself in the reluctance and inability to take responsibility, the refusal to rely on oneself, and the search for external sources of emotional and material comfort.
It is not surprising that the initiators of divorce are more often women - gender stereotypes allow them to remain weak and dependent almost into old age, but such indulgences, as a rule, have to be paid dearly. The faster a person grows up, the more successful and happier his life will be.
One of the consequences of personal immaturity is egocentrism. It eats away at a marriage like rust - gradually but inevitably. A family union of two egocentrics is doomed to a quick divorce and rarely lasts longer than three years. If in a couple only one spouse suffers from egocentrism, the other can carry everything on himself for quite a long time. But sooner or later the cup of patience is overflowing, and he leaves, leaving the second one in bewilderment and confusion.
Social reasons and factors provoking divorces
Social trends and processes cannot but leave their mark on the institution of the family. And although this is not a direct influence, but an indirect one, I could not ignore it. Let's figure out what factors can provoke such a huge number of divorces.
Propaganda of childlessness
The motto of modern youth is to live one day at a time and don’t worry. Everything that does not fit into this doctrine - namely, any responsibility, hard work, moral and ethical principles - is considered harmful and destructive. We see how the idle and selfish lifestyle is idealized in films, modern literature and show business.
Naturally, there is no place for children in such a picture of the world. And childless marriages break up much more often - this is a fact confirmed by statistics. The total number of divorces is 65%.
Exaggeration of the role of sex in people's lives
Sexual stimuli today lie in wait for us everywhere - on the street, on TV, on the radio, on the Internet; the only place you can hide from them is in a kindergarten or church. Particularly “progressive” sections of society constantly strive for sexual liberation, although there is no room for liberation. Against the backdrop of such aggressive brainwashing, married people begin to feel somewhat damaged and deprived, because marriage imposes certain restrictions on male and female libido. They begin to look with envy at their single friends and come to the conclusion that they did not have time to have fun. And having escaped to the long-awaited freedom, as a rule, they bitterly regret the broken family.
Body cult
First of all, of course, women's. The deification of girlish beauty has always taken place, but today it has acquired completely grotesque forms. It’s a paradox, but it is the fair sex themselves who suffer from this state of affairs first of all.
A woman loses her external attractiveness before a man - the birth of children leaves its mark, sad as it may be. Closer to 40, she can no longer compete with young girls for the attention of the opposite sex, while the target audience of men, on the contrary, is expanding. Having reached his fifth decade, he can be a desirable gentleman for both a twenty-year-old and a fifty-year-old lady. When young photoshopped beauties with perfect bodies look at him from Instagram pages, he begins to critically evaluate his wife. All her services to him and the years spent together fade into the background. It is at this age that men often leave their wives and demand a divorce.
Reasons for divorce: what to write in the application
When there are property disputes and common minor children are being raised, filing a claim for divorce becomes the only way out of the situation. Under such circumstances, the registry office will not issue a divorce certificate without a court decision.
With children the situation is much more serious. Both parents are required to care for them until the age of 18, or even longer if the child is disabled. Men often refuse this and avoid solving the problem, leaving the family without a livelihood.
In this case, you need to apply for alimony; in the future, bailiffs will forcefully collect it. In case of delay, the negligent father faces restrictions and sanctions, as well as penalties. To calculate it, use the alimony penalty calculator.
What reasons should you indicate in your application to separate from your spouse completely and irrevocably? Each life situation is individual, but it is still possible to identify the main motives for family breakdown.
Personal
Disagreements between two spouses cannot always be resolved peacefully. At the very beginning, in the registry office, everyone swears to be faithful, to stay together “through thick and thin.” In reality it turns out differently.
Some explain the decision to dissolve the marriage by saying that there are no more feelings or that the husband and wife do not get along in character. Someone finds “new love”, or immediately leaves home without explaining anything. All these circumstances inevitably become the basis for the rupture of trusting relationships.
Indication of such reasons in the application is usually considered a mandatory item. After all, a family is initially built on mutual respect and help.
Thus, citizen A. filed a claim for divorce in the Kiev District Court of the Republic of Crimea, where she indicated that her life together with her husband did not work out due to differences in character. The plaintiff clarified that there is no need to give time for reconciliation, since saving the marriage is impossible due to the lack of mutual love, respect and common interests between the spouses.
The court took all the arguments into account. And he made a decision in case No. 2-4607/2019 dated April 23, 2020 on the dissolution of marital relations.
No children
This motive can be identified as independent. Few couples will dare to voice it publicly. Most often, the claim indicates personal or domestic troubles.
Yes, many families go through stages of experiencing infertility. It doesn't matter what the cause of your health problems is. It is a pity that partners cannot withstand this test and break off the union without achieving a result.
Of course, it’s scary to receive such a verdict from doctors. However, the state finds ways to help not only adults, but also children - we are talking about adoption. Therefore, after considering these options, the family can come to an agreement and continue living together.
Household
Often people break off relationships for this very reason. It is not always possible to determine in advance how a person behaves when living together. After all, society frowns upon couples who live together without registering their relationship - in a civil marriage. Although, times are changing.
When describing everyday problems in a claim, it is important not to get carried away. If you overdo it with emotions, describe all the details in too much detail, the court may take it for a fleeting weakness. As a result, time will be given for reconciliation.
Alcohol, drug and other types of addiction, physical and psychological violence from a spouse are also considered domestic causes. Whether to tolerate all this or not is up to the wife to decide.
Treason
As an analysis of judicial practice shows, a wife often forgives her husband for “fleeting relationships on the side.” This leads the courts to the conclusion that when the plaintiff indicates such reasons, it is better to give time for a truce. In some cases, the application is withdrawn, formally it remains without consideration.
Of course, everyone reacts differently to betrayal by a loved one. Hasty decisions lead to the end of all relationships. And if it is expensive, the conflict will have to be resolved together.
Material component
Maintaining a family often falls solely on the shoulders of the man, since the woman gives birth to children and is on maternity leave. When there is a lack of livelihood, conflicts occur, and couples often decide to separate.
When there are minor children, fathers are aware that the wife will demand payment of alimony. Most men disappear and don't keep in touch at all. Thus, the child is deprived of communication with one of the main people in his life. The above also applies to negligent mothers; unfortunately, such situations also occur.
When indicating such a reason for divorce, the plaintiff needs to tell the court where the money to support the family was obtained. When the initiator is a man, it is necessary to clarify whether the wife knows about her husband’s financial problems. The court will give time to resolve the issue, possibly saving the marriage.
Irreconcilable contradictions in views on life
Psychologists believe that in order to get to know your lover better, you need to live together for at least a year. Their research proves that when young people start living together, many contradictions arise that were not noticeable before. There is logic to this. After all, some habits appear only in a certain environment.
However, cases where a couple’s views on life change after a year are not uncommon. Spouses can live 8 years and not realize that each of them will someday develop a different passion, hobby, or interest from the other.
In this case, the courts proceed from the wishes of the spouses themselves. If you write in the application that reconciliation will not produce results, then the divorce will go through quickly.
The husband is in prison
Of course, the legislator made sure that everyone, even citizens sentenced to imprisonment for a crime, had the right to continue family relationships. But not everything is as simple as it seems at first glance.
Unilateral divorce from a convicted person is possible in two options:
- Through the registry office.
- Judicially.
In the first case, it is necessary that the husband or wife be sentenced to more than 3 years. Deprivation of liberty must be real, not conditional. Then the other party can calmly end the relationship without explaining the reasons, the main thing is that the verdict is in hand.
If there are property disputes, there is no court verdict, young children are growing up, and the sentence is less than that specified in the Family Code, an application is submitted to the court.
Here you will have to explain everything, give reasons for a quick decision. Read more in the article: Application for divorce with division of property.
No cohabitation
It happens that the union of spouses breaks up virtually, without formalizing the separation legally. The husband leaves for another woman and vice versa. There is no time or desire to deal with divorce. Yes, and there may be other reasons.
Officially, it will not be possible to create a new family in this state of affairs. Otherwise, the marriage is automatically considered invalid with all the ensuing consequences.
By the way, the wife may not know where her husband lives. In the case when there is no news from your spouse, his whereabouts are not known at all, before filing for divorce, it is advisable to contact the police to search for him.
If there is no criminal component, for quick notification, you can indicate in the statement of claim the last known place of residence of the defendant, his passport details, INN or SNILS. In this case, you need to attach evidence of sending him a copy of the claim with copies of documents.
Health status
This reason relates more to moral factors. There are people who do not want to continue a relationship with a seriously ill person, a disabled person. But this is already a matter of conscience.
On the other hand, it is possible that the spouse hid the illness before marriage. Then divorce can be justified.
HIV infection and sexually transmitted diseases deserve a separate discussion. Concealing them before marriage makes it invalid.
Relocation of one of the spouses to another country
It is known that a person is looking for a place to live where he will be comfortable. Therefore, many citizens in our turbulent times turn their gaze abroad. The other spouse may not like this.
After all, he has a place of work, a hobby, and an established circle of friends in his homeland. Accordingly, it will be difficult to adapt to a foreign land, not to mention self-realization.
As a result, there is a reason to divorce your wife or husband. And here, too, you cannot do without going to court.
Nature of problems
The grounds for the reasons for divorce can be very different:
- Various household habits and inclinations.
- Addiction and bad habits – drug addiction, smoking and alcoholism.
- Material difficulties.
Living together between spouses sometimes leads to quarrels and conflicts on domestic grounds.
In everyday life, not everything is as rosy as it seemed before the wedding. Sometimes misunderstandings may arise between husband and wife, which over time can transform into a scandal. For example, a husband may find fault with his wife over time - she earns little, the food is poorly prepared, the apartment is not clean enough. If there is a child in the family, this can also become a reason for quarrels. For example, the husband is not involved in upbringing at all, does not control the learning process, and allows everything to his son or daughter. It is not always possible for a husband or wife to identify the bad habits of their other half before the wedding. People prone to alcohol, drug or gambling addiction can carefully hide it. But over time, bad habits will negatively affect your lifestyle and cause significant harm to others.
Almost all married couples face financial difficulties. Income instability, problems with work, the presence of trade loans or mortgages can ruin the relationship between spouses. Not all couples enter into a prenuptial agreement that clearly outlines the financial obligations and capabilities of each party.
One of the main reasons that leads to the separation of spouses who have lived together for more than one year is everyday difficulties. Not all couples will be able to overcome them, especially during the economic crisis and quarantine.
According to statistics, the court is much slower to divorce those couples whose statement of claim indicates a large number of different reasons for separation.
What reason for divorce should be indicated in the statement of claim?
Situations within a family are different. The state always tries to take all measures to preserve and strengthen the relationship between spouses. Conflicts are dealt with on television, radio, and print media. But the final decision is still made by the spouses.
When problems and misunderstandings grow, filing for divorce is the only way out. How everything is arranged depends on the conditions. In situations where there are property disputes or common children, spouses go to court.
Read in detail in the article: How to get a divorce if you have minor children.
The statement of claim is the main source of information for subsequent proceedings and determining the future fate of the “unit of society.” Therefore, the correct indication of the motives for divorce comes to the fore.
Universal
A specifically formulated position helps to quickly understand the essence of the dispute. The judge will not have to obtain additional information from the participants in the trial.
It is enough to hear the parties and their representatives. Sometimes invited witnesses can clarify the picture.
Main reasons:
- family relationships did not work out;
- different views on life;
- contradiction of characters, psychological incompatibility;
- loss of feelings and mutual respect;
- different approaches to raising children.
The list of life circumstances can be endless. In this case, you need to write briefly, without adding emotional coloring. Otherwise, there will be a feeling of thickening of colors.
There is also no need to discount the peculiarities of male and female psychology. They leave their mark on the reasons for divorce.
For the wife
As you know, women are more emotional in their statements and expressions of feelings. They always worry more and let things go “through themselves.” There are also exceptions.
Here are some common life situations:
- The husband does not want to work anywhere to support his family. Constant conflicts due to lack of means of livelihood lead to the impossibility of continuing previous relationships.
- The spouse abuses alcohol or drugs. Constantly uses physical and emotional violence against women and children. I can't stand it anymore. Keeping the family together will lead to negative consequences.
- The husband constantly cheats and has been caught red-handed more than once. Further continuation of life together is impossible.
You can paint other individual motives. Of course their number is limitless. It must be taken into account that the descriptive part of the claim must be formulated without insults or emotions. Clearly stated arguments will lead the court to the conclusion that a decision will be made as quickly as possible.
For husband
As for men. Having analyzed court decisions, it is clear that they file for divorce less often. Most likely, this is explained not only by the habit of hiding experiences, but also by constant busyness or, conversely, irresponsibility.
Reasons for divorcing your wife:
- The wife does not show any concern and is constantly looking for reasons to quarrel. Further life together is not possible.
- The wife is busy with her career, does not devote any time to the children, and has transferred all household responsibilities to the man. Ignoring the family leads to the conclusion that there is no desire to save the marriage.
- The woman constantly drinks alcohol and does not raise children. Further living together will lead to negative consequences.
The list is not final, these are typical formulations. Each situation is individual.
Reasons of a sexual nature
The reasons in the application for divorce, which are of an intimate nature, can be divided into:
- problems within the family;
- betrayal.
Every woman believes that she is the one who will stop the womanizer. Unfortunately, often the dissolute spouse does not stop in his hobby. The offended wife files for divorce after learning about the incident. It is fair to note that the percentage of female infidelity in marriage is slightly lower.
Important! When describing problems of a sexual nature, you need to be as careful as possible. As practice shows, women tend to forgive a cheating man. Therefore, the court will also give a period for reflection.
Pointing out your partner's problems is insensitive. In addition, spouses may be bound by subsequent division of property or joint children. Discussing intimate problems with third parties rarely leads to an improvement in the family situation.
Is it possible to keep the true reason for divorce secret?
Despite all possible attempts by the state to save as many families as possible, it is allowed to hide the true reason for the divorce. Usually, personal or everyday problems are chosen for this. They are clear to everyone and do not require additional explanation.
To avoid disclosure of family secrets, it is possible to hold closed court hearings. To do this, the parties to the dispute submit a corresponding petition to the court.
Thus, not only the motives for breaking up the relationship, but also all the details will be kept secret. After all, not only third parties, but also close relatives as witnesses will no longer be able to participate in the proceedings.
Features of maintaining privacy of personal life in divorce proceedings
If the main motive for ending a marriage is the sexual problems of the spouses, for example, sexual perversions of one of them or sexual disharmony, then often the participant in the marriage who suffers because of this is afraid to initiate a divorce. As a rule, the interested person abandons his intentions due to fear of publicity of juicy details of his personal life.
In this situation, we can advise you to do the following:
- You do not need to write the whole truth in your application. It is enough to limit yourself to a general phrase, for example, “preserving the marital relationship is not possible, since I no longer feel a feeling of love for my husband (wife).”
- At the preliminary hearing, you must ask the judge to order a closed trial. As a rule, the court agrees with this request. This will prevent strangers from appearing in court who will not be able to find out the unpleasant details of married life. In addition, the presence of witnesses is not allowed at a closed meeting, since after questioning they will be asked to leave the room.
What to pay attention to
When resolving conflicts between adults, do not forget about the small members of the family. It is necessary to resolve issues not only about where they will live, but also about the payment of child support by the second parent. This obligation to support children until adulthood is prescribed in Article 80 of the RF IC.
If a claim for alimony is filed, payments are assigned as a share of the payer’s basic earnings or as a fixed amount. The second option is considered when a man does not have a permanent job or the amount of interest violates his interests.
When the spouses have an unresolved issue regarding the ownership of jointly acquired property, the court decides this too. The division of property can be discussed either at a separate meeting or as part of the divorce process.
Information about what things, savings and real estate belong to joint ownership is contained in Article 34 of the RF IC. It will not be possible to simply seize an apartment from your husband during a divorce.
What grounds will be valid for a divorce through court?
To obtain a divorce, the plaintiff must provide the court with compelling reasons why the marriage cannot be preserved. In accordance with the provisions of Article 17 of family law, the most compelling grounds that may serve for the dissolution of a marriage include:
- abuse of alcohol or drugs by a man or woman and unwillingness to be treated for these serious diseases; If the spouses have small children in such a situation, this can lead to danger to their health or even life;
- immoral behavior of one of their spouses, leading to constant stress for the second and their joint minor children;
- neglect by the spouse of obligations to financially support the family. This is especially true during the mother’s pregnancy and the child’s infancy. At this time, a woman is not able to provide herself and her child with money and acquire the necessary material values;
- personal (cooling of relationships, disrespect for spouse, lack of trust, hostility;
- sexual (betrayal, disharmony, lack of attraction).
Moreover, if the divorce process involves deeply personal issues that the spouses are not ready to share, they can be considered in a closed court session.
All these cases are valid grounds for divorce in court.
Important! It should always be remembered that a marriage is concluded on a voluntary basis, therefore no one under any circumstances has the right to force a man or woman to live together. Divorce in such a situation will sooner or later take place actually and legally
How to properly draw up paperwork to dissolve a union?
It is not always possible for the applicant to correctly formalize the grounds for divorce. The reason is written in any order, but briefly and succinctly. Let's look at a few examples:
- Incompatibility of character, different views on life situations, lack of mutual feelings of love.
- Maintaining family relationships is impossible due to the spouse's alcohol abuse, which entails constant scandals and violence.
- For a long time, the spouse does not have a job and does not try to find one, and also refuses to fulfill parental responsibilities for raising and supporting children. In such a situation, saving the family is impossible.
- The wife leads a wild lifestyle, abuses alcohol and drugs, does not spend the night at home, and has been repeatedly caught cheating; she does not deny this fact. In this situation, marriage does not make sense; I consider the above to be a good reason for its termination.
- The spouse does not keep house, does not keep the house clean, does not cook, does not work for a long time and refuses to look for work. This attitude in the family indicates a lack of desire to be married.
We recommend that you look at other articles about how to divorce a foreign citizen in Russia and abroad, when your wife is pregnant, and what documents are needed for this.
Indicating the reason for the divorce is not necessary, but in the case of a judicial divorce, it can help greatly reduce the processing time. It must be written clearly and to the point, unambiguously and clearly expressing the grounds that led to the decision to divorce.
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If there are children in the family
When there are young children in the family, personal reasons alone will not be enough for the judge to decide to start divorce proceedings. In such situations, it is better to refer to financial difficulties or domestic reasons for divorcing your husband in court.
According to the law (Articles 80, 89 of the RF IC), both spouses must take part in raising the child and provide each other with financial support. Thus, the claim can indicate such circumstances as:
- lack of desire of the spouse to work;
- large expenditures of money from the family budget for personal needs;
- little or no participation in the process of raising a child;
- the spouse refuses to provide financially for the family.
Is it possible not to write why the spouses want to divorce?
To dissolve a marriage through the registry office by mutual consent, an application is drawn up using a form that is issued by a specialist or printed independently through a printer. There is no need to indicate the grounds for divorce.
If the reason for the divorce is that one of the spouses is missing, incapacitated or sentenced for more than 3 years, then in the application, which is drawn up unilaterally, in the “reason” column, the court decision or sentence is indicated (details on how to divorce your husband or wife without their consent, read here, and from this article you will learn how to divorce a convicted person).
The claim may or may not indicate the reason for divorce. It all depends on the circumstances of the divorce process:
- when a claim for dissolution of marriage is filed by mutual consent, the grounds need not be indicated;
- if one spouse does not agree with the termination of the family union, the application must contain not only the grounds, but also an evidence base that will help the judge assess the likelihood of saving the family, otherwise the divorce process may be postponed for several months to reconcile the spouses.
In what cases is a marriage declared invalid by the court?
Due to ignorance of the norms of family law, it is possible to confuse the grounds for invalidating a marriage with the grounds for dissolving a marriage. Any marriage between a man and a woman can be dissolved, but not every marriage can be declared invalid.
The grounds for the nullity of a transaction between a man and a woman include:
- deliberate concealment of information from one of the parties about the state of their health;
- concealment of other essential information provided for in Articles 12-15 of the RF IC.
To avoid problems during divorce, you should seek help from a specialist.